revisiting gratitude

Yesterday God allowed me to feel grateful again, really grateful, tears gathering at the corners of my eyes, grateful. It was in part due to the sermon that randomly played from the iPod, also due to the box of cupcakes that arrived at work. 

When I forgot how much I had, God didn’t take away to remind me of my abundance, but instead gave me more, lavishly. 

My boss has been stressed lately. When he’s stressed he yells at me for minor errors that aren’t even my fault. Frustrated I have been declaring with a self righteous spirit, I need to find another job. I need to get out of here. I need to actually use my degree instead of working under this guy’s thumb.

And then the sermon, a reminder of my true purpose, as an image-bearer and truth-teller proclaiming what Christ has done and is doing. My small job at this small office suddenly exposed for what it is—for God to do what He will with me, here, as His representative. ME, a representative of the Creator of the Universe. My only task, to seek His face.

I am still applying to other jobs, but in the meantime, I don’t need to wait to feel satisfied. The Lord has provided this job, now, and I should receive with a fullness of heart. The fact is, I don’t need to wait for my next job (or, next anything) to feel complete, to feel I have “arrived,” to feel I have “made it”. For Christ has finished His work and it is not I who live but Christ who lives in me. Hallelujah!